Breakfast Topic: MMO = MatchMaking Online?
by Amanda Rivera 
Sep 18th 2007 at 8:03AM
The multiplayer in MMO seems to be catching on these days, but for reasons you might not expect. BBC online recently published an article discussing how MMOs in general and WoW in specific make a great place to build romantic relationships.It used to be that when a couple explained that they met online, their friends would color with embarrassment or quite likely just plain laugh. But nowadays with the popularity of the Internet online rendezvous aren't as uncommon, and now it appears that MMOs are the new trend in online dating.
It makes a sort of sense, really. I was always told that dating in groups doing something you both enjoy was a perfect way to get to know someone in a safe setting. When you meet someone in WoW, you automatically have something in common: your love of the game. Grouping with a potential mate can give you insight to how they interact with people. Are they natural leaders, or are they unwilling to be generous with loot? These are all excellent indicators of how someone deals with people in the outside world.
The intimacy an MMO provides can take time in the real world, but in WoW you can whisper sweet nothings in someone's ear with a simple /w. This can naturally lead to issues on the other side of the spectrum though. Should your relationship break up, it may sour your love of the game, for instance. Even worse, you could fall prey to those who wear their characters as masks in order to lie to others. But really, are we any less honest online than we are during a first date in person?
All in all, WoW dating is definitely growing in popularity as more and more people encounter the game and see it as a way to connect with others for something more longterm than a raid. Have you any experience with WoW dating? Would you say that it is more or less realistic than dating in person?
[via BBC UK}
Filed under: WoW Social Conventions, Breakfast topics
Reader Comments (Page 1 of 1)
ErsatzPotato Sep 18th 2007 8:26AM
Met my girlfriend online (we were playing a word game, I was too far down to corner a win and made silly jokes, she caught a Buzzcocks reference and that was that!) and her female married friends live vicariously through her. They're maybe age thirty to fifty and think it's great she met someone that way.
Me, I find the whole thing endlessly embarrassing.
Erica Olson Sep 18th 2007 9:20AM
Wonderful way to meet someone - not. IMHO, they can pretend to be anyone and anything they want to be and lie like a rug. How do you know they're telling the truth? It's hard enough to meet, to get to know and to figure out what a person is really like IRL much less behind the anonymity of the internet game.
After all, how many men are out there playing female toons? I know those who think it fun to pretend to be what they're not and fool others. I still get "yur a gurl - really - IRL?"
Gendou Sep 18th 2007 9:22AM
My wife and I met online, and now we play WoW together.
We also have five or six real-life couples in our guild, and at least one couple who met in our guild and then moved across the country to be with each other.
Five Warlocks Sep 18th 2007 9:28AM
I brought my girlfriend to WoW, and I highly recommend that anyone who wants to raid even casually do the same. But *finding* a girlfriend in WoW? Seems to fly in the face of common sense, unless something about that voice on Ventrilo really gets you going.
plixer Sep 18th 2007 9:30AM
one thing I think that's good about it is that you meet each other based on personality alone, without judging based on looks
(of course my buddy got rejected the moment she saw his picture, so whatever)
kunukia Sep 18th 2007 9:42AM
My daughter has been with her husband 10 years...they met online. Have two RL friends who met SOs online, and a guildmate is getting married to another guildie.
ErsatzPotato Sep 18th 2007 9:52AM
Despite my testimonial in an earlier post, I agree it's a stupid way to meet people for romance. We got lucky and have been together real life for years, but no way would I recommend it.
Smurk Sep 18th 2007 10:30AM
Some people may recall those awful T-shirts/posters that said something like "Beer: helping ugly people have sex since 1500!"
This is some next level shit. "WoW: helping even uglier people have sex since 2005!"
Of course, when Buzzcocks references are involved, all bets are off.
Kuhtarl Sep 18th 2007 10:38AM
Now I'm already married and we met prior to the advent of the INTARWBENET, but I met dozens of people online who liked to 'raid' IRL.
Oh the butter parties are simply scandalous! Screenshots forthcoming.
Rayze Sep 18th 2007 10:43AM
Shouldn't be considered anything different than Myspace, imo. I'm with Erica though...WoW has many 'girl posers' so it's a tricky situation. Then again, there's the 'Vent voice' but there are plenty of uglies who have hot voices lol. I've met plenty of people online - some good, most not lol - but hey it's life...experience all of it.
Meg Sep 18th 2007 11:03AM
Wow...and I thought "I" was cynical. Personally I have had a bit of dumb luck meeting the guy I am seeing through WoW. I'm not saying it will last forever, but it's been a blast so far. Oh, don't forget a lot of us girls play male toons. ;)
Gimmlette Sep 18th 2007 12:05PM
There are good/bad things about any way to meet a potential mate. My experience, as an older woman playing a predominantly young-male oriented game, is that the anonymity allows the person on the other end of the toon to be what they want to be, whether that's social or anti-social. I hear a lot "You're really a 'girl'?", which I can only surmise is because so many guys (and we have them in my guild) are playing females. When that voice comes over Vent for the first time, it can be a shocker. I like the relationships I've made through WOW and find a bit more honesty than through the dating service. A few of us met face-to-face for the first time but it was as if we'd known each other because, in reality, we have. There is still something of a stigma to saying "I met him online in WOW", but it will fall away as more couples meet and marry.
Rob Sep 18th 2007 3:54PM
Anyone interested in this topic should explore Nick Yee's website, he's got a bunch of research on MMOs and dating. One thing i found to be interesting is that according to his research, at least half of female toons in WoW are played by men, whereas almost all male toons are played by men. Further, (again according to his work), 16% of subscribers are female.
site is here
http://www.nickyee.com/daedalus/
ksexsmith Sep 18th 2007 2:24PM
My boyfriend and I met because of WoW, though not IN WoW itself. I had a personal ad on Craigslist, but because I'm a total WoW addict (and readily admit it), I wanted to meet a guy who was just as much of a WoW fan as I was. So in my ad headline, I used WoW terminology (70 hunter LF1M for Karazhan, PST - and yes I know that's phrased wrong, and I've never actually been to Kara, but it worked). It caught my boyfriend's eye, he read the ad, sent me an email and the rest is history. Oddly enough, he was actually browsing Craigslist for car stereo parts, not women... his foray into the personals was a "hmm, what the hell, let's have a look" type thing. He's actually getting a divorce and hadn't been single for that long prior to meeting me and wasn't really looking for a new girlfriend, but the sparks were crazy and we just hit it off.
The idea of people meeting through WoW and dating doesn't bother me one bit. Every guy I've ever dated, I met online in some way or another. Both my boyfriend and I are insanely shy in person and if we'd met at a bar (not that I actually go to bars, and he hasn't been in a long time) it never would have happened. Because we had that text buffer there at the start, it worked.
Nati Sep 18th 2007 3:38PM
I don't know about the other girls here, but an environment where the overall maturity level is something on the level of "pix or ur a guy" doesn't get me very inclined towards romance, at least! The notion that I have to keep proving my gender to people I don't know just makes me less eager to get to know others online, period.
MENNONH Sep 21st 2007 1:45PM
My girlfriend and I met in an online game, now we play wow after living together for 3 years. We also have a few couples in our guild that have met online and been together for quite a while.
Chrissie Sep 20th 2007 2:01PM
I'm a testament to online dating in mmorpg games such as World of Warcraft.
On May 15th, 2006 I met my fiance in the Arathi Highlands when we were abandoned by our group and left alone in the middle of Stromgarde Keep. He was a lvl 38 dwarf paladin (now lvl 70) and I was a lvl 41 night elf hunter (also lvl 70). He was being beaten up terribly by ogres in Stromgarde so I rode in, dismounted, and started whooping some butt with my pet Tsubasa (white wolf). After he exchanged several thank you's I gave him all my mana pots and was about to move on until he invited me into a group. We both saved each other from the perilous ogres all evening until we found a safe spot and ended up talking the night away till dawn.
After talking I found out he lived in Los Angeles while I lived in a small town in Missouri called Wentzville. Every night we played and quested together! Two months into our online relationship we decided it was time to meet, since we'd already exchanged pics and myspace emails.
On August 25th, 2006 we met face to face in the beautiful Garden of the Gods in Colorado. It was half way for both of us, I drove alone and so did he. Luckily he had family living in the Colorado area so we got to spend a night in a lovely hotel together and I got to meet his family in the small three day weekend we spent together. No one in my family knew of my trip until the day I left.
After our encounter we knew we were meant to be! In October I got to see his home for a week in L.A., CA and some of his best friends. It was a wonderful experience even if we didnt get to see the highlights all I cared for was being with him.
In December 2006, he was able to spend a month with me in my home in Wentzville, MO. This is when we made plans and knew we had to be together no matter the cost. We drove across country together to visit his family in Colorado, once there on Christmas morning he proposed to me on his families staircase. After he left on January 10th, 2007, 5 days before my birthday, all I could do was cry horribly as he went down the airplane terminal to his flight home. I've never cried so hard in my life...
Two months later in early March, my now fiance barrelled up the driveway in his pickup truck and leather jacket and swung me around and around! We've been together for a year and half now counting the time we met online!
Some people call it a fluke, others an act, a lucky chance...I thoroughly believe in my heart though that everything happens in this world for a reason even if we do not understand it at the time.
So if your ever on the Feathermoon server, and you see a dwarf paladin on his epic paly mount named Mcallen whose accompanied by a lovely night elf hunter on her exalted horse named Akamiya...say hello and believe in hope and love.