Advice columnist covers WoW addiction
This just keeps coming up. This time, anonymous husband "Walking on Eggshells" wrote advice columnist Amy Dickinson for help. His wife of 20 years has succumbed to the dread WoW Addiction, and is forsaking both Walking and their mutual children. Apparently, she's had an affair with a Guildmate and everything.Of course, Walking is feeling dejected, and especially burdened since he's picking up the slack around the house. He wants to get therapy, do something to help the relationship -- but his wife's just saying that he needs to love it or leave it.
It's always a little frustrating as a WoW player to read about this kind of thing. My personal stance is that if they're having this kind of problem from World of Warcraft, the same would have cropped up with something else eventually. Issues like these don't appear magically on their own, wrecking houses as the login screens comes up.
Amy does direct Walking to Online Gamers Anonymous. As she points out, they've got a 12 step program and everything. Well, good luck to them. I really do hope they manage to get the problem worked out. Quitting WoW can be done, but they'll need more to solve their family issues.
Filed under: Analysis / Opinion, Odds and ends, News items
Reader Comments (Page 1 of 4)
Asa Aug 14th 2008 1:09PM
If she's playing 12-15hrs a day consistently I couldn't imagine she's bringing in any money. If that's the case, the solution is pretty simple. Stop paying for internet access and her account.
Nizari Aug 14th 2008 1:34PM
That would only fix a symptom and not the underlying root of the problem. It seems to me that this woman, not just playing every waking moment but also sleeping with a guildmate, is just trying to find an escape from a life she doesn't like. Take away the WoW, and it'll just become something else.
glorft Aug 14th 2008 1:12PM
WoW is the most common target, as it has the largest player base.
haircute Aug 14th 2008 1:13PM
Well hopefully the impending divorce will free up some more game time for her. Her guild probably needs and her she shouldn't be bothered with all these RL problems like marriage or kids. You Go Girl!
Todd Aug 14th 2008 1:18PM
um she cheated and obviously doesn't make any money yet she tells him to like it or leave it? 20 years or not thats over.
Of course once they divorce she now gets half of what they own plus vaginamony (and child support) so she still ends up not working and freely sleeping around. Guess it's lose-lose.
Nizari Aug 14th 2008 1:32PM
Not specifically. If the husband could document to the courts that his wife is spending 12-15 hours a day playing WoW, that would pretty well establish that she's not going to fulfill the child-rearing requirements that custody entails, and he'd get the kids. And the details of whether or not she'd get "vaginamony," as you so misogynously put it, depends on what kind of pre-nup agreements they made.
zappo Aug 14th 2008 2:15PM
She doesn't do anything productive all day, but you still have to feed her... I'd say dump the woman and get a dog. At least it'll possibly get the paper and play with the kids. Oh, and he more than likely would get the kids since they'd end up neglected sooner or later.
If they actually ask the kids it's quite likely they'll end up supporting the father's case.
Verodio Aug 14th 2008 1:19PM
Definitely have your internet disconnected or take the router to work with you. The account will take care of itself.
ohitefin Aug 14th 2008 1:21PM
Is it possible to get addicted to WOW? yes. Is it possible to get addicted to work, drugs, alcohol, gambling etc? again yes. Its not a matter of what the addiction is. I'm not comparing wow to crack, but again you can get addicted to anything and everything. One of my guildmates is horribly addicted to wow. I know it, the rest of the guild knows it and im sure he knows it too. However there is little to nothing i can do(don't know him personally and its not really a topic you can bring up with a person you don't know that well).
WOW is an escape, just like any other medium including TV or other video games. All addictions are equally harmful. If this person is truly playing wow 12-15 hours a day then she is addicted. there is no question about it. She is ignoring her family, her job(He says she is an expert in addiction, so im guessing this was her previous job) etc. She does need help, just as a drug addict needs.
I'm not saying playing wow 20 hours a day is considered an addiction. Another one my guild friends(this one i personally know) is on playing pretty much all weekend, but i rarely ever see him during the week and there have been weekends he showed up for maybe an hour or so to check his mail, auctions etc. This is because he has a job, wife etc.(doesn't have kids though, so hence the time on weekends). This can't be classified as an addiction. It could be, by the extreamly cynical, but in my opinion if your doing what needs to be done, what you do in your freetime is up to you.
Sorry for the long reply. I don't know why your angry over this article to be honest. She clearly has an addiction. That the addiction is WOW and not something else is just incidental.
miked Aug 14th 2008 1:31PM
I think Michael Gray is angry about the article because the finger is being pointed at WoW and not at the person with addiction problems.
Kaylek Aug 15th 2008 9:51AM
I'm with this guy, I don't feel WOW is being blamed for this. They don't seem to imply that the design of WOW is the root of the problem. At most, they're saying the nature of the game facilitates her destructive behavior. But responsibility is still placed on her to change the situation, not WOW or Blizzard.
Even so, the core design of WOW, or any game that focuses on long-term character development for that matter (especially when placed in a social setting like an MMO), greatly tempts addictive behavior. Also, the average player fits in perfectly with the textbook definition of an "addiction" (including most of those who call themselves "casual players").
If you can't acknowledge that, you're just fooling yourself.
jefeweiss Aug 15th 2008 10:42AM
The problem with WoW addiction as far as the media goes is that it doesnt make THEM any money. If you watch TV for 12 hours a day, then you are just being a good ad target. I think TV is a far bigger problem in the vast majority of families then anything else, but you aren't going to see any reports on TV about it. Or from other media outlets that have any kind of shared fiscal interest with TV for that matter.
Raukus Aug 14th 2008 1:28PM
Pot smokers like to think it isn't bad for them, alcoholics like to think they drink socially, hardcore wow players like to think they're not addicted.
Own up to what you're doing with your life, rose colored glasses won't help anything.
Liel Aug 14th 2008 1:32PM
@Raukus /amen
I used to play a lot last year I even fess up to it, wow addicts like other addicts try and find ways to make their addiction "socially acceptable". They say an addiction is harmful when it starts impacting other areas of your life. I know people who have flunked out of school, got in trouble at their jobs because they were dragging ass from raiding all night etc, etc.
Not saying Wow is different but like other addictions it can be harmful by certain people.
deviationer Aug 14th 2008 1:31PM
L O L
at least it's not another TV news story or web "journalist" spouting crap and making WoW seam like the devil.
native Aug 14th 2008 1:32PM
i love how everyone gets all self righteous about WoW when a specific story about an individual or a few indiviuals crops up detailing the struggles with addiction that DO exist on occasions.
when we hear a story about an alchoholic the beer guzzling community doesn't freak out. when we hear a story about the sneaky uncle molesting kids the International Brotherhood of Uncles doesn't go apeshit.
I've NEVER (and I challenge anyone to find an instance) seen where someone claims ALL WoW players are either addicted or in imminent danger of being addicted.
Until someone makes that accusation, I don't see a reason for these articles to get such ridiculous play on WoW related sites.
Personally I think this goes back to the whole immature mindset that everyone is out to get you, you're misunderstood, blah blah blah, /wrists.
This isn't some grand consipiracy to abolish WoW. This is a real life example of someone who had a real life problem and in no way does it reflect on the WoW community as a whole.
DirtyPriest Aug 14th 2008 8:50PM
Exactly. Did anyone even read the article? Her answer was to him was: "You have a problem. Here is a website to get help." No reason to go apeshit over it.
Erlin Aug 14th 2008 1:38PM
On the surface of this article it seems this woman has a problem. Her husband is feeling neglected. He claims she has "had an affair" with another WoW player - even if this is just an online thing there are trust and loyalty lines that can be crossed for some people.
What I always find perplexing about "WoW addiction" pieces are how they never mention how WoW playing times compare to average TV viewing on a weekly or daily basis. Depending on your source (mine is Nielsen Media Research, NTI Annual Averages through 2007
) the average TV viewing time for women is 35 hours per week and for men it's 28 hours per week. Consider - that's an AVERAGE. I have multiple level 70s in epic gear and I don't play anywhere near that amount.
The other thing I never see mentioned is the cost. WoW has to be one of the cheapest hobbies a person can take up. I think my bar tabs have declined about $300 a month since I started playing. : )
Henry Aug 14th 2008 1:43PM
This is the same with controversy over video games in general. There are many people in this world who have problems. Maybe they don't see the value in another person's life. Maybe they have addictive personalities. There are many people who have serious problems, and every so often, one of them happens to play video games (or in this case, WoW).
I don't think that it's a problem with WoW. I feel that if WoW didn't exist, she would have just attached herself to something else.
TotalBiscuit Aug 14th 2008 1:46PM
WoW is not addictive in and of itself, but it provides a well for wasting time that is almost bottomless. Fact of that matter is this woman has her priorities all screwed up and obviously was vulnerable in this sense from the get go. WoW is the symptom, not the illness, treat the illness.